Dear Santa, please bring us a toilet…

Now I’m not sure of the exact protocol here, but plumbing should definitely be on the list of items accessible through the Jolly Old Elf. Especially when you are a family of five, most of them teenagers and you’re down to one bathroom.

The destruction of the Throne was a multi-layered event; blame cannot be laid at the door of one person. B was the proximate cause, apparently, during her recent visit, when the rusted parts finally gave way. The Cabana Boy, too, opened it up and took apart the insides and then had some issues with the bolts. But really the issue, I think, is that date on the inside of the tank: February 11, 1985. This toilet is older than most of my children. I don’t know the life expectancy of a toilet, but I’d think a quarter-century ought to be pretty commendation-worthy, right?

To his credit, the Cabana Boy pledged himself to the all-day chore of tearing apart the guts of the thing, much braver than I would have been, but the rusted bolts were his undoing. A circumspect genuflect served to put the thing to rest, and we are now waiting for the arrival of the reindeer with our shiny new works…or maybe the plumber, if he gets here first.

Meantime, I GET DIBS ON THE DOWNSTAIRS BATHROOM!!!

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5 thoughts on “Dear Santa, please bring us a toilet…

  1. i was about to say “1985? That wasn’t that long ago! Why, i just graduated from high school in 1980…” and then i realized that i’m old…

    on the bright side? you can use the old toilet as a planter for the front yard! i’m sure the neighbors would love it!

  2. For the record, I totally thought the dental floss would have worked. If the other part wouldn’t have made that snapping sound. And the lid would have gone back on. 🙂

  3. Ha ha, Daisyfae, tha’s what I was thinking too, that 1985 was just a few…OMG. It was SO long ago!!!! Oy.

    I’ll keep that thought in mind about the planter…I get closer to the Trailer Park every year. 🙂

  4. Merry Christmas Barb, to you and all your family. I wish you a nice new and shiny toilet. This is the first time I get the chance to send such a wish at Christmas, which shows that no matter how old one gets, there will always be something untried around the corner – or at the next blog.

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